J'y suis jamais allée
by Bonhiver
Summary: Involuntarily, Jane is helping to fill this year's quota of girl who falls into ME. Trying to adjust into her new surroundings is hard enough, but she can't even remember how she got there! Maybe a certain Balrog Slayer can help? GlorfindelOC
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: (in homage to Crimson Starlight)

Well, we'll see where _this_ goes. I used to have an account but it got deleted somehow, soooo I'm starting over. This idea has been waving itself in my face forever. But this one (points to Glorfindel) finally sat my ass down at the computer and forced me to write it.

Glorfindel: (smug smile) It's true.

I did this over a weekend instead of study for a history final. So, my apologies if this really sucks...

Glorfindel: ...and it does.

Hey, I tried! Besides, you're lucky I even wrote about you in a story that didn't have you poncing around with Erestor or Haldir.

Glorfindel: (look of discontent)

Heh, that's what I thought. So, disclaimer. I'm not making any money off of this. The title I took form Yann Tiersen and the characters I took from Tolkien, except for Jane.

Glorfindel: Yeah, and what's with her name, anyway? _Plain Jane_?? This blows.

SHUT UP, I LOVE THAT NAME! It's simple and easy. Suck it.

Glorfindel: Whatever...

While I go to discipline an elf (not like that, you dirty girl!), enjoy the fic! Review, please. Flames will be used to burn Glorfindel's hair, so bring 'em in!

Glorfindel: Nooooooooo!

---------------

Glorfindel had entered Elrond's study with great trepidation. Today had been one of the strangest the Balrog Slayer had seen in millennia. And as he approached the Lord of Rivendell, he saw the reason for all of his worry and anxiety over the past twelve hours.

A human girl, no more than nineteen was sitting in a chair. She was greatly altered in appearance since the last time he had seen her; the strange, wet garments she had been wearing when he found her at the bank of River Brunien were now gone and she was wearing a traditional elleth gown, though she looked very uncomfortable in it. The girl who introduced herself as "Jane" was also entertaining herself with a goblet of wine and a plate of food: fruit, bread, vegetables, and meat, an uncommon fare for Elves, but very customary amongst the race of Men. But the girl's demeanor had certainly changed. Instead of the terrifyingly silent and detached girl who clung to his robes from hours ago, Jane was now alert, vibrant, and despite her manner of distaste for her clothing, she seemed relatively content. When she saw Glorfindel approach, she smiled in her rescuer's direction. He returned it with a polite nod before addressing the somber elf next to her.

"You wished to speak with me, my lord?"

"Yes, Glorfindel," Elrond Half-Elven began, rising from his chair to offer his advisor his own goblet of wine. "Please sit, we have much to discuss."

The faithful servant obeyed and turned to the black-haired girl. "Are you well, lady?"

Jane finished swallowing the last of her wine and smiled. "_Much_ better, thanks," she replied animatedly. "Everyone here has been so lovely. I met Lord Elrond's children when I was going to the seamstress."

Glorfindel hoped that the twins had not made a bad impression. While Elrond's youngest, Arwen, was polite and loved by all, her elder brothers, Elladen and Elrohir, were the proverbial pain in his side since they became adolescents. He and Erestor often fell to watching over the Terrible Two, but it was becoming a full-time job, for as they grew older, they grew wiser and more cunning, more able to avoid the two Elf lords' hawk-like gaze.

"I am glad to hear you are enjoying yourself," he said, making a mental note to warn the twins of any meddling in the young girl's life.

"But we have more pressing matters to discuss, my friend," Elrond interjected in a more serious tone. Jane and Glorfindel looked to him, pleasantries at an end. Elrond continued, "It appears that from what Lady Jane has told me, she does not know how she came to be here. She has never ventured near Rivendell; in fact, she has no knowledge of it or even Middle Earth. She is from a land called... what was it, my lady?"

"Vermont," she smiled proudly.

"Yes, Vermont," Elrond continued, the name sounding foreign on his tongue, "and does not remember how she arrived in Imladris. But some of the things she explained to me were beyond my knowledge. Perhaps you can offer your wisdom to help her."

Glorfindel nodded. "I will do my best," he promised, turning to Jane, who was now tugging on the sleeves of her gown, obviously feeling uneasy again. She bit her lip as she looked up at Glorfindel. Elrond stood up from his chair. "I will take my leave, so that you can have privacy. My lady," he turned to Jane, "I promise to you, we will do everything we can to help you."

She smiled. "Thank you, Lord Elrond."

He and Glorfindel merely bowed slightly in parting. When the door closed, Jane sighed heavily and put her hands in her head. Glorfindel immediately turned to her. "Are you troubled?"

Jane was more relieved to be away from Elrond, from everyone else. The past day had been the longest of her life. The last thing she remembered was being at an apartment party in Harvard Yard with her best friend and the next thing she knew, she was sopping wet, being yanked onto a horse by some blonde man who turned out to be an _Elf_, and now found herself in a world she had always known to be completely and utterly fictional. That was more than one person could handle.

And it wasn't that she had been treated badly, quite the contrary. She really enjoyed Elladan and Elrohir; they seemed to be easy to get along with and fun, a nice change of pace from their austere and somber father and his stiff advisor, Erestor. Jane even liked Arwen for as little as she spoke. But being around Glorfindel, Jane just felt at ease, relaxed. Maybe because he was the one who found her, calmed her down, wrapped her in his cloak, and brought her back to Imladris that she found herself drawn to him. But hearing Elrond's footsteps fading into the distance, leaving her alone with the Elf Lord was enough relief for Jane to break the slightly uncomfortable and reserved posture she had kept with since she entered the study.

"I'm fine," she murmured, pouring herself more wine, "just overwhelmed."

"Yes," Glorfindel replied in his serene baritone. "If you would prefer to speak to me when you are more accustomed to your surroundings, I would understand."

Jane shook her head. "No, we can talk now. Just... can we go outside?" she asked, sounding a little self-conscious. "I've been so cooped up all day. I need somewhere to stretch my legs."

"If that is easier for you, of course," Glorfindel consented.

"Great."

They both stood, Glorfindel yielding his arm to Jane, which she accepted. They left Elrond's study, going down the elaborate staircase that was slightly attached to the tree. Jane was still in awe of the architecture of Rivendell, as an Art History major. There was hardly anything like it, she was sure, back home "on Earth." She breathed in the cool fall night air and felt slightly more calm as she and Glorfindel walked through the forest that was his home. Growing up in a small town in Vermont, she had always been a person who loved the outdoors and even after moving to Boston for college, she would drive outside of the city, into the more rural areas to take in the more rustic landscape.

"Jane is a very unusual name," Glorfindel commented. "I have never heard of it in all my travels."

She laughed. "It's the most average name. There's even a kind of nickname for it, 'Plain Jane.' But my full name is Elizabeth Jane Grey. I just like Jane better."

"Why?"

"I dunno," she shrugged. "I guess I like J's." Glorfindel smiled in reply. They continued to stroll through the

After walking in silence for a few minutes, Jane sighed. "It's beautiful here."

Glorfindel nodded and smiled. "All think the same when they first set eyes on Imladris. To be sure, it is one of the most magnificent places in Middle Earth. But I believe every realm has its charm."

"Do you like it here best?" she asked, looking at his pale face, shining in the moonlight.

"No," he replied. "Middle Earth is not my home, despite its beauty. My people were born in Valinor. Many who came here are leaving to go back; soon the Elvish race will be nothing but a memory."

Jane remembered that from watching the Peter Jackson movies. She had been wondering all that time if she should mention Frodo or the Fellowship or even the Ring; she was worried that the Elves would think she was some kind of enemy. So she decided she should find out as much as she could about vague things to discover her place in time. She had been told the year, which was beyond useless as she had no concept of time from watching the movies. _If only Veronica were here,_ she had thought sadly. _She knows _everything_ about Middle Earth._

"Have any mortals gone there? To Valinor, I mean." _Frodo went there, didn't he?_ she tried to recall.

"Not ever," Glorfindel said. "Our home is the Undying Lands. No mortals have ever set foot there."

_Well, that means it's before the Frodo stuff. But that doesn't really help me, does it? Fuck!_

"It's probably more beautiful there," she said lamely, trying to find a way to discover more.

"It is," Glorfindel said, but sensing a new anxiety in Jane. "Shall we stop here?" He gestured to a stone bench in a small clearing, where a small meadow of wild flowers rested.

Jane nodded. She could figure out her whereabouts later. They sat in silence, Jane unsure of how to begin her story, Glorfindel worried about upsetting the girl.

"You are not from this world, are you, Lady Jane?" Glorfindel asked as he stared into her eyes, sparkling in the moonlight.

Jane only shook her head. "Not at all. To be completely honest, I've heard of Middle Earth," she admitted. "But it's a fictional place. From tales and books." She dared not elaborate more, for fear that she would reveal something in the future that she was already aware of.

"What do you know of this place?"

She shrugged. "Not very much," she lied. "I'd heard of Rivendell and the Elves. And I only can remember one story about Beren and Luthien Tinuviel fairly well."

Glorfindel nodded. It is hardly any wonder that such a tale of star-crossed lovers would reach her world. And the Lady of Light is perhaps the most well known Elleth, it is no surprise that word of her beauty and kindness reached the ears of mortals a world away.

They sat in silence for a while longer, Jane worried that the golden-haired lord didn't believe her completely. She changed the subject. "So, I'm just supposed to tell you how I got here?"

"If that is all you wish to tell me. What can you recall of your home before you arrived?"

"Lots. But I can just tell you about the last thing I remember? I can't really go through my life's story or anything. Nineteen years is a lot for me."

Glorfindel smiled. "Whatever you feel is important."

"Well, here's the thing," she said, a blush rising into her cheeks. "I don't remember _that_ much from my last night there. I was... er, well... do you know what happens to humans when we drink too much wine or mead or..." she trailed off, embarrassment getting the better of her. She smiled sheepishly, waiting for a response.

Glorfindel smiled encouragingly. "Yes, I have heard of those effects on your race. The results are most humorous."

Jane looked relieved and laughed. "Yeah, it's pretty funny. Anyways, I was completely gone, I'd had this thing called Everclear Punch, it's really potent. I was at a party with my friend in a place called Boston, it's where I live now for school. And the very last thing I remember was toasting with my friend and then everything from then on gets kind of fuzzy. This thing happens when you 'black out' when you're drunk," she explained, finding the entire concept of college parties a really funny topic to be explaining to two very intrigued Elf Lords. "So I blacked out and can't remember past that. It's the first time to ever happen to me; I can usually hold my drink," she defended herself. "And I could only see black. Then, suddenly, there were twinklings of stars. It started slowly at first, but soon there were millions and billions of stars around me, passing me, like I was flying past them. It was like I fell off the world into the realm of nothing. I couldn't feel my body, my mind, the ground, or anything. I wasn't hungry or thirsty. It was like _I_ was nothing. And everything. Does that make sense?" she stopped and ran a hand through her hair, frustrated. She looked at the fair haired elf for reassurance in her sanity.

After laughing at her explanation of inebriated adventure, Glorfindel realized what had happened to Jane. The same thing had happened to him years ago, after his terrible battle with a Balrog. However Jane came to be in Middle Earth, she died in her own world. He had only heard of such an occurrence among beings like Elves and the Istari. Glorfindel only nodded for her to continue, wanting to be sure of Jane's rebirth.

"Well, it was like I was in space this entire time. And time just didn't seem to matter. It was the weirdest thing that's ever happened to me. I was there for what felt like centuries, millennia, the entire lifespan of the world. And then, I was awake. But I was wet and cold and I didn't know where I was. And then I realized I was in the river. I got out and I was so exhausted that I couldn't do anything but lie on the ground. I didn't even care where I was. I lay there for hours. I thought I was going to die." She paused and smiled. "That was when you found me."

Jane felt relieved to recount her entire "adventure" to Middle Earth. Though _she_ didn't understand, it was nice to know there was someone she could ask who probably knew; Elves had such wisdom about them. It probably came with the immortality thing. She looked at Glorfindel, who still had yet to say anything. But he didn't have to. His furrowed brow and silence told her everything she needed to know.

"Did something bad happen to me?" she asked quietly, feeling a knot in her stomach and a lump in her throat.

Glorfindel looked at the young woman, the girl. Her eyes were sparkling in the moonlight and her mouth was open slightly. She looked more worried than he had seen her before.

"My lady, what happened to you is very uncommon, if not unheard of by anyone by the race of Man," he explained. "It was a rebirth."

Jane scrunched up her eyebrows in concern. "Which is what exactly?"

"In order to be born again, you must die," he clarified. "And since this world, this Vermont and Boston you lived in, as you've told me, have no connection with Middle Earth, to have been reborn here, you had--"

Jane inhaled sharply and exhaled, her breathing shaky. "So, I'm dead?"

Glorfindel nodded somberly. "In your world, yes. And I cannot say that it is likely you will be able to return."

The news hit Jane in the chest like a bullet. She could never go home, see her friends, her family again. She would never see the familiar peaks of the mountains near her house, her pets, nothing and no one. Finishing college wasn't an option. There was no way to go back. She was dead, her body lying God-knows-where and she didn't even know what had caused it. She had no one with her in Middle Earth. She was completely alone.

Jane heard the sobs tumbling out of her mouth before she felt them racking her body. She felt hopeless, lost. She sunk to the ground onto her knees and held her sides tightly as she felt more and more full of anguish; each heart beat, each breath was another reminder that she was in another world, miles, light years, an infinity distance through space and time from her home. And there was no way of returning.

Suddenly, she felt arms around her, wrapping around her torso and pulling her against something solid and warm. _Glorfindel,_ she suddenly remembered. Glorfindel was with her, kneeling with her, comforting her, holding her. He spoked to her in hushed tones, caressing her hair, cradling her head on his shoulder. Jane could only keep crying in acknowledging his presence. There was nothing else _to_ do; she felt that her life was at an end. The idea that she was dead to everyone who knew and loved her was more than she could take.

Glorfindel continued to hold the sobbing girl, whispering to her in Quenyan and rocking her back and forth. He could only wait for her weeping to cease. He gripped her tightly as her cries of desperation, despair, and dolor continued, echoing through Imladris. He felt such great sorrow for her; he himself had gone through the process of rebirth, but there were very few consequences to his return, not like Jane. She was gone forever from all she knew, with no way he knew of to return. Finally, he felt her start to calm down. Her cries were more subdued and her breathing was becoming even again.

"My lady, I wish there was more joyous news that I could give you," he said dolefully as he held her. "But I swear to you, I will do as much as I can to help you."

Jane sighed shakily, feeling tears continue to fall down her face. "Thank you," was all she could say as he continued to hold her, "Thank you so much."

---------

Jane awoke to a warm sun caressing her eyes open. She yawned and sat up in bed, gaining consciousness of her surroundings. Quickly, the recent events came crashing back to her and she fell back onto her bed and groaned miserably. She had spent the entire day before in her room after her encounter with Glorfindel, sleeping and crying. She didn't leave her bed. She had been so overcome with grief and disbelief, she had hardly known what to do besides hide from the world she was now stuck in. But a new sense of hope swept over here. When she lay on her soft mattress, she decided she should join the world again, whether it's hers or not. She would adapt. Still, it hardly seemed fair that she had to completely reestablish herself in a new home, just after paying her housing fee for her dorm.

"This is bullshit," she whispered to the ceiling. She smirked at how ineloquent that was. Here she was in this Elf Haven, the most beautiful places she had ever seen _and_ a place she had always thought was just in books and movies. She was surrounded by perfection in the nature of the trees and grass and flowers, as well as the beings around her. She had never seen so many breathtakingly gorgeous people in her life. And all she could do was curse in bed.

She couldn't help but laugh. In fact, a small snicker turned into a chuckle, which then became a giggle, and before she could realize, Jane was cackling in her bed, holding her side as it ached with her hysteria. She rolled from side to side under her covers with tears streaming down her eyes. And yet she continued. What a total change from two nights ago; she hardly remembered Glorfindel carrying her to her room, as she was so weak with grief. And now she was full of glee she could barely contain herself.

A knock on her door brought her laughing frenzy to an end. She wiped her eyes and kept giggling as she walked to the door to her room to see Glorfindel looking worried on the other side.

"My lady?" he asked anxiously. "Are you...?"

Jane began to laugh harder. "No... heehee! No more of this lady stuff!! HaHAAAAAHAHAHA, pleeeaaase!" she guffawed. "Just Jane!"

Glorfindel raised an eyebrow, a small smile playing on his features. "As you wish. I only came to make sure you were well."

Jane grinned, her laughter finally stopping. "I mean, I'm as fine as I can be, considering. But, thanks." Her stomach also replied by roaring loudly to the Elf Lord. Jane giggled and tapped her stomach. "I guess I could use something to eat."

Glorfindel nodded. "Of course, I can have your handmaidens bring you breakfast. What would you like?"

"Anything. I'm starved."

"I will return," he said, nodding in departure, then walked away. Jane closed the door, still giggling.

"Oh, Glory," she sighed as she looked around her room. She found a small water basin with a pitcher next to it and she decided to wash her face before changing for the new day. _Great, _she thought as she splashed her face, m_ore Elfy dresses. Soooo poncy._

Glorfindel returned within twenty minutes with one of the elleth from yesterday, who was wielding a plate with cheese, bread, fruit and a goblet on a tray. Jane had already brushed her hair (but not her teeth, that would take getting used to), changed into one of the gowns she had had made the day before, a light blue one.

"I guess I'll have to get used to no eggs and pancakes," she said quietly to herself, but smiled as she began tucking into her meal. She and Glorfindel sat at a small table with chairs in the "sitting room" of her "chambers."

"You seem to be fairing better, Jane," Glorfindel noticed, his blue eyes watching her as she ate.

She nodded. "I guess so," she decided. "It was the shock of the whole thing that really scared me. I'm not over it, but I'm adjusting."

"I am glad." He smiled and Jane returned it avidly.

"Thanks again," she said after a few moments of silence.

"I was only glad to help you two nights ago," Glorfindel replied.

Jane shook her head. "I meant for saving me. That was really weird for me, waking up suddenly in water."

"I can only imagine," Glorfindel laughed lightly.

"Can you show me around once I'm finished eating?" Jane asked. "I really want to see Rivendell."

"It would be my pleasure."

---------

Jane felt very inferior to the tall Elf as he escorted her around the forest. He was tall even by looking at the other Elves she had seen walking around. His long golden hair reached past his shoulders, with one braid in the front. His whole face demanded respect, with a knowledge beyond what Jane could imagine. His eyes that had been piercing in the moonlight, were a soft pale blue in the sun. He seemed more at ease than in Elrond's study, but she still felt that he held a certain countenance about him that was sightly intimidating. Yet, she felt safe as they walked through the vast forest.

Glorfindel asked her questions about her home, but she found it to be too difficult to explain more of her life because of all the different customs and technology, so she soon switched to asking about his life. He told her of his many travels, battles, and accomplishments. He told her of his rebirth after his slaying of the Balrog, which greatly piqued her interest. But at his mention of the Battle of Fornost against Angmar, Jane asked him about the Witch King.

"The name sounds familiar," she lied, again, remembering exactly who he was. She knew if he would explain more about the Witch King, she would be closer to finding out about the year and its relation to the Fellowship.

"He is a Nazgul," Glorfindel said darkly, "a servant of the Dark Lord, Sauron. In the Second Age, Sauron gave to the nine kings of Men nine rings. They were all great kings, but like many in the race of Men, they were blinded by greed and power. They took the rings without question from the Deceiver, each falling into darkness. They are now slaves to his will, always searching for the One so it can return to its master."

_Yes, yesss! Here we go! So, we're in the Third Age and the Ring is still around!_ Jane cheered mentally. "The One?" she asked airily, pretending to be unaware of the darkness of which she asked.

"The One Ring," Glorfindel continued to explain. "It is the most evil object, created by Sauron in Mordor, the darkest realm of Middle Earth. He used it in an attempt to turn out world into his servants. In the Second Age, he almost succeeded. The Man, Isildur, King of Gondor, defeated him. But Isildur was a fool; instead of destroying the Ring, to rid the world of Evil, he kept it for himself," he said in disgust. "It only led to his death. And now, the Ring is nowhere to be found, still holding a new bearer after it abandoned the creature Gollum."

"So, now that Gollum doesn't have it, nobody knows who does?" Jane asked.

Glorfindel shook his head. "Not for years has anyone heard news of the Ring."

"This is Bad News Bears," she said. "Do you think there is going to be another war?"

Of course, Jane knew of this. But it was important for her to pretend. The Fellowship was yet to be created. And if Gollum did not have the Ring, then surely Bilbo did, which meant it could be like, forty years before Frodo would get it! _No Tenth Walker for me! I won't be a Legolas Mary Sue!_ she exclaimed to herself. Her best friend from home, Veronica, had a mild obsession with _Lord of the Rings_ and had explained the wonders of Fan Fiction.

"Yes," Glorfindel's dark tone returned. "To save Middle Earth and the good here, we must defend it from Sauron. His spirit endured his physical death by Isildur. He rose again, at first in a stronghold called Dol Guldur, the Hill of Sorcery, in southern Mirkwood, another Elvish realm. There he was disguised as a dark sorcerer called the Necromancer. The Elves did not realize that he was the Deceiver returned. One of the Istari, Gandalf the Grey, stole into Dol Guldur and discovered the truth; eventually the White Council of Wizards and Elves put forth their might and drove Sauron out. But he simply moved back to Mordor and raised himself again in Barad-dur. And there he lingers, as an ever watchful eye on the Tower of Barad-dur."

Jane felt goosebumps as Glorfindel explained new information of the Dark Lord. She never had understood his transition between man and flaming eye.

"I feel kind of bummed out now," she said, trying to lighten the mood.

Glorfindel raised a delicate eyebrow. "Bummed?"

She laughed. "I forgot, you don't know my slang. I just mean that we were talking a nice walk around and now it's all Sauron, Evil, Nazgul. Let's talk about something else. Tell me more about these... hoppits?"

This time, Glorfindel laughed as she placed her arm in his. "Hobbits. I will tell you of a very interesting hobbit, called Bilbo Baggins..."

----------

"Wait, what?" I shouted after choking down my wine at the news.

Glorfindel and I were sitting in his study, me stuffing my face with food and drink, him delicately indulging in a goblet of wine. He had brought me there later that night to show me maps and old history texts. Needless to say, I geeked out _big time. _But then he decided to spring some news on me! And we all know how I loved news from the Lord of the House of the Golden Flower. Apparently, Elrond thought it would be in my best interests if I spent my time being _tutored_. Not just in academics, but in _combat_. So, needless to say, I was more than pissed.

"Lord Elrond sees it as imperative for you to be trained in combat," Glorfindel said, slightly confused by my outburst.

"Nooo no no," I laughed. "I don't fight. Physically, I mean. And I don't wanna learn MORE! Today was plenty informative."

"Jane, I promise it will not be a terrible experience. Erestor is a very good teacher and--"

"HIM???" I shrieked. I had met him when I arrived. I can sum in up in one word: whatadick! He was such a wet blanket.

"A what?" Glorfindel asked as I voiced my thoughts.

"You know, like a party pooper, lame brain, jerk burger! He just seems like a stiff, like no fun and all work."

"I assure you, you will learn as much as you can from him," Glorfindel promised. "And I will be training you in sword combat, archery, and knives."

"Cut me some _slack_, mahdude!" I begged. "Knives? When would I ever use _knives_??"

Despite my love of the outdoors, I was clumsy. Not overly so, the way Stephanie Meyers wrote about Bella to make her more "relatable" to the hordes of pathetic teenaged girls who can't grasp the complete destruction of vampiric literature as we know it. I'm just a little klutzy, with the occasional stumble on the stairs, dropping papers, not that bad. But I never was one to test my equilibrium with knives. That seemed like I was just asking for trouble. Even if Glorfindel was helping me, I knew I would make a total fool of myself. It wasn't worth it.

"Maybe you should try these studies to see if you enjoy them," the Elf Lord offered. "And then you can decide whether to continue them."

I huffed. Arguing with a powerful Elf Lord almost seemed futile. "Well, fine. But don't expect me to come skipping through the forest to meet you to play with _knives_."

**----------------------STOPHERESTOPHERE---------**

Phew! That's over! Sorry, I didn't really have a better cut-off point. I just started writing and didn't want the first chapter to be too long. Can't have y'all getting your hopes up about long ones!

Glorfindel: Unless we're referring to _my_ long one.

Wow, inappropriate! Let's keep those comments to ourselves, ey?

Haldir: Oy, missus!

Uggghh, what now?? You're not even supposed to be here! Get outta here!

Haldir: What and leave you with the guy who wasn't even _in_ the movie?

Glorfindel: Like it's _my_ fault that fat Kiwi replaced me with a _chick_!

'Scuse me?

Glorfindel: Oops...

Haldir: ooOOOohhh, you're in trouble now!

Well, guys, while I punish two v. bad Elves, review! Please?


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note (in homage to Crimson Starlight):

Well, I lied. I think chapter might be longer than the first. I don't know how, but I've been pluggin' away at this story! Unprecedented, I should say.

Glorfindel: Knock on wood, knock on wood! You say that _all_ the time and what always happens?

Uh oh, maybe I am counting my chickens before they're hatched! (knocks on crappy dorm bunk bed)

Glorfindel: (knocks on bunk bed also for good measure)

Ok, now that we got all the superstitions out, disclaimer! I don't own shit, except a bad plot, two Longchamp purses, and a crappy French accent. Thanks to MRS. GLORFINDEL and VeronicaD13 for reading AND reviewing!

Glorfindel: Maybe if the _rest_ of you did it...

Shh, don't be mean. We have to keep them coming back!

Haldir: Since when was being nice a good thing to do? How do you Speidi got where there are? Not by being good people, thats for sure.

Okay, seriously. Get your monkey butt _outta_ here before I completely cut you out of the story!

Haldir: (eyes widen, squeal, and runs back to Lórien, AS HE SHOULD!)

Glorfindel: (snigger)

-------------

"My lord, this is so BORING!!!!" I complained for the millionth time that day. I had been stuck in a cramped, dusty room, pouring over old records with Erestor, who had to remove the mallorn tree shoved up his ass if he wanted to get me to like him, let alone to understand what he was talking about.

"Lady Jane," Erestor began in his very best Catholic school teacher voice, "this information is imperative for you to know. It may not be very lively, but you must know it if you want to grasp the history of Middle Earth, if not just the Elves."

I rolled her eyes and groaned. It was only the fifth lesson and I was more than ready to give up. I always went in unexcited, sleepy, and loathsome, and left feeling exhausted, angry, and confused. At least I had my combat lessons with Glorfindel to look forward to.

Glorfindel was beyond an excellent teacher. In less than a week, I was an accomplished bowman and was already holding my sword properly, quite a feat for someone who's never come near one before, except in history museums. Besides, it was fun to hang out with Glory. He came off as kind of stiff and proper sometimes, but I really liked him. He was so easy to get along with. I mean, not as easy as the twins, who were a non-stop comedy show of sexual innuendo and jokes, but I felt relaxed around the blondie. Did I mention he was getting more attractive as the days went on? He was sooo elegant and swift when he demonstrated combat techniques, which I failed miserably to mimic. It was enough to just watch him. The only good thing about going to Erestor's stuuupid lessons was that I was getting closer to being with Glorfindel.

"Can we be done for the day?" I begged Erestor. "I need a nap and lunch before I go practice sword fighting. I promise I'll look over these notes and texts tonight."

Erestor nodded in consent. "You cannot learn when your mind and focus are in two different places. You may go."

I sprinted out of the room, raising dust, as I tried to get away from Lord Party Pooper as quickly as I could.

_Thank baby Jesus that's over,_ I groaned inwardly. _One more hour and I would've choked myself on the dust to get out of there._

I made my way onto the forest ground, walking towards the archery fields to get in some early practice before my lessons started that evening. Suddenly, I heard my name being called by two identical voices.

"Jane! Where are you going?"

Obviously, it was Elladan and Elrohir, the heartbreakers of Imladris. I grinned as I saw them coming towards me, looking as hunky as ever. They approached me and jovially bowed.

"I thought you had lessons with Lord Erestor now," the one in blue robes commented (I still couldn't tell them apart). "Did you decide not to go? I wish you luck explaining to him why you decided to be truant, he will be even worse tomorrow."

"No, as a matter of fact," I said smartly. "I got him to let me go early, after I begged him."

"You were begging?" said the other, his grey robes matching both twins' steel eyes, sparkling with merriment. "If only we could have seen it."

"Erestor's a merciful master," I laughed. "I was just on my way to the archery fields. Care to join me?" I asked.

They shuddered. "If we go there," said the first, "we are sure to run into to Lord Glorfindel. And after our last encounter, I doubt he wants to see us for a while."

I raised an eyebrow. "What happened?"

The pair shared a devious grin before the one in grey commented flippantly, "Absolutely nothing. Elladan and I were simply enjoying the day, riding through the forest with two lovely elleth, Nessa and Brégdhel and--"

"Oh, don't bother telling me the rest," I rolled my eyes. "I've only been here for a few weeks and I already know about you two with all the elleth here. I'm sure whatever happened 'in the woods' that Glorfindel caught you doing, you deserved being punished."

The twins feigned shocked faces. "My lady Jane," Elrohir began, sounding scandalized, "I can hardly believe this from you! You of all of Imladris should know of the great kindness we portray for everyone, especially the females that dwell in our father's house. They are visiting from Lórien, my brother and I were simply showing them the wonders of our realm."

I snorted. "Whatever, pervs. I'm going to the archery fields," I laughed and began to walk away.

"But they are so far from here!" Elrohir pointed out. "You would want to walk that long distance alone?"

I shrugged. "I like walking."

But Elladan insisted. "Come, we can bring you to the stables to find you a horse. Have you ridden since you arrived?"

"Not since Glorfindel brought me here, no. And I really don't want to ride, I prefer--"

At that, my hunger made itself known. I blushed as the twins smirked at my human function.

"No one should go to the fields without proper nourishment!" Elrohir announced. "Come, let us feast before you leave us."

I rolled my eyes and followed them. There was no denying my hunger. But I was dreading the Elvish food she had been eating. While it was delicious and light, I longed for the heavy food I had at home, like my mother's lasagna and soups, Chipotle burritos, and holiday feasts. Even a cheeseburger combo from Checkers, my rare indulgence, would be a welcome meal. I was presented with the usual spread of crusty bread, cheese, fruit, vegetables, and meat, this time it was venison. I didn't want to complain, but I saw that the twins noticed my slight distaste as I ate.

"Does this food not please you?" Elladan, the more intuitive and sensitive of the two, asked.

I smiled. "No, it's fine," I assured them. "I just miss my food from home."

"Yes, your race does seem to have a real obsession with food," Elladan laughed lightly. "We enjoy feasts, but there will not be another until the Winter Solstice, in December. Normally, we eat very little."

"Well, I don't know very much about the people here, but back home in my world, there are _so_ many different types of food," I said fondly. I was getting hungrier by the moment. "We have holiday feasts, too, we just have them more often, especially depending on your religion. I _love_ food," I admitted, laughing. "I mean, what I've eaten here is really fresh and I do love it. It's just that it's almost Thanksgiving, which is a holiday basically devoted to an enormous feast with family and friends. Everyone overeats on that day and it's so glorious. I would do anything for some stuffing and sweet potato casserole."

I sighed fondly, wishing I was at home sitting at the old oak table my mom inherited from her parents, with my parents, my three little brothers, my older sister and her husband, Tom. Thanksgiving was never dull; the football games were on in all different rooms of the house with Tom, my brother Jake, and my dad running back and forth between games as my mom, my sister Jackie, and I slave in the kitchen over turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, apple pie, and the rest of food for the dinner. I would hardly leave the dinner table without feeling a comatose state of satisfaction. I missed it.

"Tell us more about your home, Lady," Elladan said, intrigued.

"Oh, Christ," I laughed, "where can I start..."

--------

Jane and the twins had lost track of time. They had wandered all around Imladris, though always staying near the center. Jane was becoming more familiar with the area, despite the ever-changing forest surrounding her. The twins were excellent company, full of jokes, stories, and questions about Jane's life; they found her to be the most interesting specimen they had ever encountered. She had somehow gotten them to understand the concept of telephones and was working her way through an explanation about electricity when they ran into Glorfindel.

"My lord," the twins said in an almost sardonic tone as they bowed deeply to the golden-haired lord. He only glared at their antics, then turned to Jane.

"I hope you are on your way to the archery fields for our lesson?" he said, lightly chastising her.

She nodded. "I am," she lied, "I just ran into them on my way over."

"It seemed wrong to make her walk such a long distance by herself," Elladan began.

"So we took it upon ourselves to see that she found her way safe and sound," Elrohir finished.

"I thank you two," Glorfindel said in a slightly vexed tone, "but I will walk with the lady Jane the rest of the way."

The twins shrugged. "If you insist, my lord," Elrohir said airily. He took Jane's hand and kissed it lightly, winking at her as he rose. "It was lovely, as always, to see you, my lady."

"Thanks," Jane laughed as she saw Glorfindel furrow his brow in irritation. "I'll see you lot later, yeah?"

"Sooner, we hope," Elladan crooned.

"We'll make sure of it," Elrohir added, sending a charming smile her way as they left her with the now slightly infuriated Elf Lord.

"Sorry about all that," Jane laughed, but looked apologetically at her teacher. "You know how they can be."

Glorfindel shook his head. "Only too well, my lady," he replied.

Jane huffed. "Honestly, you really don't need to call me 'Lady,'" she reminded him. "I certainly don't have noble blood in me. Jane is fine."

"Of course, Jane. Now, shall we go while it is still light?"

Jane nodded. "But do you think we could take horses?" she asked politely. "It is pretty far and if I'm learning all of this combat, I should start riding also, shouldn't I?"

"I agree," Glorfindel said, "we will arrive there more quickly. Come, the stables are not far from here."

They walked for a few minutes, Jane commenting about how the beauty of her new forest realm continues to surprise her. They reached the stables very quickly and Glorfindel approached his steed, Asfaloth, a beautiful white stallion.

"He's gorgeous!" Jane breathed as she took in the site of his majestic horse.

"And very loyal," Glorfindel said fondly as he took Asfaloth by the reigns and brought him out of his stall. "Now, we shall find you one."

"Can I pick?" Jane asked, feeling like a small child with her father buying a horse. Glorfindel laughed and agreed. They walked down the stable aisle to find a tall buckskin horse that immediately caught Jane's eye. It reminded her of a toy she had played with as a child.

"That one," she smiled and pointed.

Glorfindel smiled as she approached the horse and pet its nose. The horse seemed to enjoy her attention and Glorfindel could sense that they were a perfect match. "He is a strong one, and very young."

"Good, I love him," she said happily as she lured him out of the stall. "Does he have a name?"

Glorfindel shook his head. "When a horse finds its master, it takes the name it is given."

Jane grinned even wider, she loved naming animals. "Roosevelt."

The Elf Lord raised a delicate eyebrow. "Roosevelt? Is that a common name in your world?"

Jane shrugged. "It was the name of two of my country's presidents- I told you about those, right? Our elected rulers? Anyways, I'm naming him after the second Roosevelt, Franklin, the hot one with the polio. No horse of mine is carrying around a big stick like Ted."

Glorfindel only shook his head, not understanding her reference, and gave her reigns for "Roosevelt."

"What, no saddle?" Jane said. She had ridden horses before when she was little, but would have never called herself a horseman. Bareback riding was not an accomplishment of hers.

"These horses are among the most majestic, most powerful," Glorfindel explained. "Saddles only hinder their abilities."

"How can I get _on_ him then??" she asked. While Jane was not short by any means, in fact, she was tall for most women, but Roosevelt was a fairly large horse, as were the rest in the stables.

"I will help you," he promised.

Jane rolled her eyes as Glorfindel picked her up and placed her on Roosevelt's back. She _definitely_ felt like a little kid with her dad at the county fair. Still, it felt empowering to be on the back of such a noble beast. Roosevelt whinnied with approval as she situated herself and grabbed onto the reigns. Glorfindel quickly mounted Asfaloth with such grace and ease that Jane could only feel jealous. She urged Roosevelt forward cautiously; she didn't know if he would freak or stand still. Luckily, he seemed to understand and began a slow walk.

"Very good," Glorfindel commented. "Now urge him to go faster."

Jane did so, copying what she saw Glorfindel do to Asfaloth. Soon, she and her teacher were galloping through the woods on their steeds, side by side.

"This is nice," Jane commented as they slowed their horses down. "I haven't ridden a horse in years."

Glorfindel agreed. "It is always comforting to be united with such a noble animal."

"Do you go riding very often?"

"Every morning, I take Asfaloth through the forest as the sun rises," Glorfindel said fondly.

"That sounds fantastic," Jane said dreamily. "I love being outdoors. And I feel like I'm outside most of the time when I'm here. I love that your kind only adapts with nature, never destroying it, just sort of mingling with the trees and stuff."

Glorfindel nodded. "Elves work symbiotically with the trees and the leaves and the wind and the beauty it gives us; we do not need to harness and control it the way Man does," he said.

"I mean, I do like towns and cities," Jane reasoned, remembering the bustle of the streets in Boston. "But I love the escape into nature."

"You are very different from the rest of your race," Glorfindel noticed. "I have met few Men that share the same love for the wild with my kind."

Jane shrugged. "We're not so different. Not to be cliché, but it's true."

Glorfindel watched as the golden sunlight shone on her onyx hair as they continued through the forest. He was more than intrigued by this girl. He knew she was from another world and despite the many times they had spoke, he felt that there was still much to learn about her, about the race of Men.

In all his many years of life, Men always remained a mystery. As an Elf, it was difficult to grasp the concept of aging and death, loss and misery. Men who live only eighty years feel such an array of emotions, yet in Glorfindel's many millennia alive, he felt as though he had less to show for his experiences. Men are so subject to change and he felt that even with the great wisdom and mastery he possessed, there was so much yet to be seen and done. Having eternity to live made time pass quickly when he saw the changes in the world, but slowly when he saw so few in himself. Life and time were such complicated subjects for Elves, especially when in the presence of a mortal, who had such little of it.

The pair rode in silence until they reached the clearing in the forest, where other Elves practiced their archery. They dismounted and let Roosevelt and Asfaloth rest as Jane and Glorfindel took their bows and arrows to the range.

"I'm getting better, aren't I?" Jane asked as she came closer to hitting the target's center than she ever had before.

Glorfindel nodded. "Archery comes naturally to you," he commented. "But you must learn to bring this same confidence and control to your swordplay. It is the most useful form of combat."

"But it's so hard," she complained as she prepared another arrow to be shot. "I'm not much of a fighter."

"You must be prepared in these trying times to defend yourself when the need will arise."

"Fine, fine," she consented, shooting her last arrow only an inch from the center. "We'll do swords now."

_Remember,_ she reminded herself mentally, as she watched Glorfindel un-sheath his sword, _no sexual innuendo about his big sword, his long sword, his stiff sword, his beautiful sword... okay, that's enough! Just keep it clean._

Glorfindel handed her another sword he brought with him, placing her hands where she should. Jane felt heat rising to her cheeks and couldn't help but think she was wrong about being a Mary Sue. She gripped the handle tightly and brought herself into a defensive position as Glorfindel stood before her, his sword at the ready.

"Now, you must block my attacks," he said gently. "I will restrain myself since you are still so inexperienced, but you must understand the importance of defending yourself before you can strike your opponent."

"Please, be gentle," she begged, before adding mentally, _with your big sword, this is my first time!_ She shook any naughty thoughts of him from her mind, before preparing herself for his attack.

Glorfindel raised his sword swiftly and Jane shrieked, but put her sword in the defensive position she had been taught. She blocked his blow and squealed in excitement.

"Focus," Glorfindel warned her. "Now, again." He moved his sword again and tried to strike her at a different angle, which Jane again blocked and smiled. She was finally getting the hang of it. Again, Glorfindel would rain down with his sword, but Jane got quicker with her blows, she even was able to push his sword away from her. Her arms felt tired when they finally stopped; swords were really heavy! But she knew she had done better with her defending than she ever had before.

"Very good," Glorfindel congratulated her, sounding very impressed. "Are you certain you have never handled a sword before?"

Jane closed her mouth tightly to keep from more innuendo, but her mind ran wild. _Geez, when did I become such a horn dog??_ she wondered as she shook her head to Glorfindel's question.

"Now, we will practice different attacks," her teacher said as she shook her arms from the pain they were feeling.

After another hour, Jane was panting, sweating, and looking worse for wear. Though Glorfindel, she noticed, was still as pristine and perfect as he had been when they arrived. She had drooled over him the entire time they fought and even in her exhausted state, she couldn't help but imagine how excellent a kisser he obviously was, with his slightly full lips and strong shoulders.

"Can we be done?" she panted as she dropped her sword and fell on her butt in exhaustion. "That was great and all, but... WOO!" She fell on her back and lay down, still out of breath.

Glorfindel laughed at her display. "Of course, you have done very well today," he agreed, handing her his water skin, which she yanked from him and chugged. "We will continue tomorrow."

"Fine, great, whatever," she brushed him off as she stood up, gripping her thighs tightly. "I'm going to be so _sore_ tomorrow."

"The end results will be worth all of this pain, Jane, I promise," Glorfindel assured her as he helped her onto Roosevelt. "You are not the first of your kind I have trained in combat; it is difficult at first."

Jane raised an eyebrow as they began their journey back to the stables. "Oh, really?" she asked, surprised. "Who was the other one?"

"A ranger from the North," he said vaguely, but that was more than enough for Jane to know who it was.

_Great, so now I'm being compared to future kings,_ she thought sardonically.

When they arrived at the stables, Jane caught a glimpse of herself in the water basins. Her hair was frizzy in many different directions and her tunic was askew. She looked a hot mess. Quickly, she straightened her hair and fixed her clothes as best as she could, feeling her face growing red as she looked at Glorfindel from behind as he attended to Asfaloth.

"You could've told me how terrible I looked," she said to the Elf Lord as they left.

Glorfindel raised an eyebrow in question. "Pardon?"

Jane rolled her eyes. "I look frightful! In all my years of working out and everything else I've never looked _this_ bad."

"Your appearance does not offend me," Glorfindel said, trying to hide a smile. He found her outbursts over seemingly trivial matters very amusing.

"That's easy for you, you're always so prissy and pretty all the time," she huffed enviously. "It's hardly fair that all you Elves look so well put together every moment of every day."

"Why are you so concerned with such things?" he asked. "We are two different beings, you and I. You have a beauty that no elleth possesses."

Jane blushed and stumbled over her words at such a compliment. "Oh, er.. I mean, you really think that?"

"I do," he affirmed. "There is such life and vivacity to your race, Jane. You are captivated by so much in this world, you find such splendor around you and I envy you. You are a beautiful thing to behold."

She grinned widely. "Oh, well, um... thanks." That was more than enough for her. She was officially smitten.

Glorfindel escorted Jane back to her chambers. "Thanks so much for everything," she said sweetly, feeling very happy for the first time in almost a month.

"It is my pleasure, Jane," he replied pleasantly, before adding, "Tonight, it would please Lord Elrond if you would dine with him, myself and Lord Erestor. He would like to see how you are adjusting to your life here."

Jane nodded. "Sure, it's no problem. Maybe I can weasel my way out of lessons with Erestor," she laughed.

"They cannot be so terrible," Glorfindel chastised, but his smile let Jane know he was only joking.

"Oh, but they _are_!" she groaned unhappily. "I mean, I wouldn't mind if I knew a thing about Elves, but I have _no_ common knowledge! These names and places are so impossible to remember, I don't like it at _all_."

"Very well," Glorfindel consented. "I will see what I can do to end the lessons."

Jane smiled widely. "You are the _best_. Seriously, I think I'd die if I had to go again tomorrow."

"I am glad you are satisfied," Glorfindel laughed. "Do you require anything else before you retire?"

"Yes, please," Jane replied. "I could use a bath after all of that sweating." She felt slightly self-conscious again as she stood next to the perfect being Glorfindel was.

"Of course, I will call your handmaidens to bring you hot water and soaps. If you do not wish to wait, there is a hot spring very close to your chambers that you can use in privacy."

Jane shook her head. "I love being outside, but I have this thing about lurking perverts watching me bathe," she said. "But, thanks. Maybe once I know if the twins are the lady killers I think they are."

Glorfindel shook his head. "I would see to it that they would not go within miles of the springs, but if you would prefer to bathe here, I can arrange it. I will return soon."

"Thanks," Jane said as she watched him walk away. She sighed as she closed her door and cursed. "_Merde!! Bien sûr je suis amoreuse, il est __très__ beau _et_ il a dit que je suis belle même si j'étais suée! Je le veux si maaal!_" (Shit!! Of course I'm in love with him, he's gorgeous _and_ he said that I was beautiful even though I'd been sweating! I want him so badly!)

Jane paced through her room, grabbing a robe she saw in her wardrobe after she took off her smelly tunic, leggings, and boots. She hesitated putting on the robe; she walked to the basin, poured water in it and looked at herself as best as she could. Jane was not surprised by what she saw there, she had been looking at that face, that neck, those shoulders, for almost twenty years. She never thought she was ugly or plain, but the fact that Glorfindel had called her beautiful was a little hard for her to believe.

"_Regarde toi-même,_" she said, psyching herself up in her mirror. "_Tu es pas moche. Mais c'est impossible qu'il t'aime._" She sighed deeply before saying, "_Je suis si seule. C'est pas juste._" (Look at yourself. You're not ugly. But it's impossible he likes you. I'm lonely. It's not fair.)

With that realization, Jane put her robe on and sat on the divan in her sitting room and waited for Glorfindel to return with hot water. She felt so strange being cared for the way he did. He obviously felt responsible for her since he was the one who found her. She enjoyed the attention he gave her and while she was sure he felt no romantic attachments to her, Glorfindel at least enjoyed her company. All these thoughts were running through Jane's mind while she hummed to herself a French pop song she loved.

_J__e veux te voir_

_Dans un film pornographique_

_En action avec ta bite_

_Forme patatoes ou bien frites_

Pretty soon she was bopping along to the beat, tapping her feet and dancing to herself in her seat. It was a pretty dirty song, but Jane loved hearing it when she would go to clubs in Paris or singing it with her host sister who lived in Lyon.

_Pour tout savoir_

_Sur ton anatomie_

_Sur ton cousin Teki_

_Et vos accessoires fetiches_

She moved on to the next verse, making up words. Finally standing up, she danced all around the room, making vulgar movements and thrusting into the air. It was a song she and her best friend Veronica loved to shout in the car or at parties. They discovered the singer, Yelle, one summer when they visited France together on a school trip. Jane laughed to herself when she heard the knock on her door. She made sure her robe was covering everything and opened it, to see Glorfindel and her maid, Elwine, who greeted Jane, then brought the buckets of hot water into the bathroom where they were emptied.

"_Merci bien!_" Jane said to the Elf Lord, before laughing and correcting herself. "Sorry, I was just singing in French, I forgot I had to make the transition back."

Glorfindel raised an eyebrow, amused. "French? Is that a language from your Vermont?"

Jane shook her head. "It's from another country called France. It's across this big ocean from where I live. I absolutely adore it there. Everything is so beautiful and the people are so friendly and... so French. I love the language."

"It is a very beautiful language," Glorfindel agreed.

"I like Elvish, too," she said. "They remind me of each other, they're spoken so fluidly. I wish I could learn."

"I could always teach you in addition to your other lessons."

"No way," she declined. "I don't want to keep up with Erestor's stuff. It's so hard! I mean, shouldn't I know the language if I want to learn the history of everything?" she tried to reason, knowing it didn't make very much sense.

"If that is what you desire, we can begin lessons in Quenyan whenever you would like," Glorfindel assented.

Jane grinned widely, pleased that she would be spending more time with Blondie. "Thanks, so much, Elwine," she said as the redheaded elleth curtsied to leave.

"It is my pleasure," the other replied sweetly, then left.

"And you too," Jane turned to Glorfindel. "You're doing so much for me, I feel like I should pay you back!"

Glorfindel laughed and bowed. "It is an honor that you put so much trust in me, Jane. I am more than happy to do it." He paused before adding, "And besides, spending all of my time doing the bidding of Lord Elrond often grows tiresome."

Jane smiled even more. "Glad I can get you out of your crummy duties. So I'll see you in a bit for dinner?"

"Yes. Shall I escort you?"

"If you'd like," Jane replied musically, secretly beside herself with joy.

"Very well, until later, Jane," Glorfindel bowed and left the room.

Jane, still grinning like an idiot, she went into the bathroom, took off her robe, and gently sat in the warm tub. _Finally, it doesn't suck here,_ she thought pleasantly, succumbing to the warmth of the water.

**-----------------STOPHERESTOPHERE----------------**

Hooray! Now, my very favorite groove machines—

Glorfindel: _Nobody_ is going to review if you call them groove machines. How old are you?

You shut your mouth. And this is coming from an Elf who's lived _how long_?

Glorfindel: (put in his place)

That's what I thought. So anyways, if y'all reeeally wanna make me failing my finals worth it, please oh please please with sugar and Haldir on top—

Haldir: (in Lórien, listening in with his super Elf hearing) Hay!

I don't remember asking if you cared. Is this called Haldir's Note or Author's Note?

Haldir: ….

Exactly. _So,_ my super funky groove monkey readers, a review would really go a long way with me.

Glorfindel: And me!

Haldir: And me!

Elrond: And me!

Elladan & Elrohir: And us!

Erestor: And me!

Figwit: And me!

Orophin: And me!

Rúmil: And me!

Gil-galad: And me!

Valar: And us!

Okay, that's enough! Figwit, go away, you haven't even made your debut! And Gil-galad, what're you even doing here?? You've been dead since forever ago!

Gil-galad: (in Kristen Bell voice) You know you love me... XOXO, GG

Are you kidding? Just because you have two G's in your name does _not_ mean you're Gossip Girl. And that was a terrible impression.

Gil-galad: Spotted. Bonhiver with a bad case of writer's block. What's the matter, B? Feet still stuck in the snow of your work?

...Wait, what?

Elrohir: That literally made no sense.

Elladan: Where'd you even find out about Gossip Girl? Isn't that, y'know... non-existant in our world?

Varda: The CW is the _only_ channel we get.

Ulmo: (shudder) If I see another episode of _90210..._

Estë: Or _The Vampire Diaries..._

Ew, how is the CW the only channel you get in Valinor? Isn't supposed to be perfect there, free of death, dying, and things that suck?

Manwë: Well, Nessa got us _The Parent Trap_ and a bunch of 90s Disney movies, so we'll live. And why would I know we only have the CW? It's called _Author's_ Note, not Valar's Note, remember?

Haldir: Oooh, buuuuurn! Gimmie some skin, my man!

Manwë: (raises eyebrow)

HA! Denied! You forget, _Haldir, _I will always have the last laugh.

Haldir: Are you sure about that? AAAAHAHAHAHA...

HAHAHAHAHHAHHAAAAAA....

Haldir: ….HAHAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA....

...HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

Haldir: (glares) ...AHAAAAAHAHAHA...

...HEEHEEHEEEEEEEEEEE...

Haldir: (face gets blue) …HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAHAHA...

(flips the bird) ...HAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAA...

Haldir: (passes out from lack of oxygen)

HAHAAA!! Told ya. Time for bed!

Pippin: Hee hee.

Heeyy, where'd you—(passes out on bed from exhaustion and lack of oxygen)

Manwë: (high fives Pippin) Nice one, dude.

Pippin: Thanks. So, what's this I heard about The CW? I haven't seen the new _One Tree Hill_ yet...


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note (in homage to Crimson Starlight):

Hey, sorry it's taken me so long! I've had this chapter done for a while, but then I started adding stuff to random parts and lost track and then Thanksgiving happened and then I had to finish a paper about the English Reformation for my asshole teacher and then I started writing _another_ story that I think you guys would like if you like _The Dark Knight_ and—

Glorfindel: Shut uuup! Do you ever stop? Besides, nobody likes Batman! He's just some rich guy in leather and a cape that fights clowns.

Joker: (appears) Just a clown, huh? (does that crazy tongue thing and takes out a knife) Well, you wanna know how I got these scars?

Glorfindel: Eep! No thank you!

Aww, c'mon. It's a really great story.

Glorfindel: (little girl voice) I'm sure!

So if you promise to keep your big mouth shut, you won't have to.

Glorfindel: (nods)

Okay, good. Thanks, Jack. I'll bring you back when needed.

Joker: Don't call me that!

Whatever, you don't own me. I do what I want!

Joker: But... you don't own _me,_ either.

Glorfindel: Or me!

Well, er... no.

Glorfindel & Joker: Then what are we here for?

(shrugs) You figure it out while everyone reads.

--------------

Jane managed to squeeze in a short nap after her bath until Glorfindel arrived to escort her to a meeting with Elrond and Erestor. She opted for a dark green dress, crossing her fingers, hoping Glorfindel would like it. Jane still felt uncomfortable in Elvish clothing, longing for her favorite blue dress from Urban Outfitters, which by some lucky chance, was the dress she had been wearing when she was brought to Middle Earth. It was sitting in her closet. Jane looked down at herself, contemplating if she should be comfortable but possibly inappropriate for the Elves, or traditional and awkward in Elvish garb.

Jane chose the former. Quickly, she ripped off the gown, which was a little too tight on her stomach anyways, and slipped into her own gladiator sandals and dress. She immediately felt better, more like herself as she fixed her hair. She was wearing her bra and underwear to complete her look, making her feel much more like a Bostonian college student and less like a reborn woman seeking refuge in Imladris. Jane started to walk to the water basin to see herself, but she stopped. She felt something heavy in her left pocket suddenly and stuck her hand in.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME???" she shouted happily as she pulled out her 80GB iPod. She _did_ have it in her pocket that night (she remembered leaving her phone at her apartment before leaving for the party)! She had completely forgotten! It was too good to be true! She squealed in excitement, hoping that it still worked from rebirth and unexpected swim.

"Please, oh please please please baby Jesus, Valar, Yahweh, Allah, Brahma, Vishnu, Shiva, Buddha!" she shouted as she put in her headphones and pressed play on the song she had been in the middle of listening to.

By some diving force, it worked. Suddenly, Jane's ears were filled with the brass of European folk and mournful voice of Zach Condon, Beirut. She shouted again as the music continued.

_A Sunday smile, you wore it for a while_

_A Sunday mile, we paused and sang_

_A Sunday smile, and we felt true_

_Nothing could be better than this,_ Jane thought happily as she hummed to herself and waltzed around the room to the soothing Balkan indie folk she so adored. It was beyond lucky that she had a functioning iPod, but who knew how long it would last? The battery life was half full.

_Whateverrr, I've got my music back!_ Jane thought as she danced around, putting her music on shuffle.

She was in the middle of a particularly excellent interpretive dance to The Decemberists when Glorfindel arrived. Jane opened the door still singing O Valencia and sang to its tune what she had to say to the Elf Lord.

"Ooooh, Lord Glorfi-i-indel! Let's go to dinner now with Elrond, and Erestoooorrrr and I swear to the stars, I'll burn this whole city dooowwwnnn!" she sang loudly as the blonde only raised in eyebrow in question.

"What is this device?" he asked, gesturing to her iPod.

"It's an i-Po-o-oood! And it holds my muuusic in it! It's so com-plicated to explaaaaiiiin," she replied. "But I found- it iiiin- this dress and it's noooot waterdamaged! And an ode of love was your dying cryyy."

Jane laughed as she took off her headphones and placed her beloved device from home down on the table. "Sorry," she said. "I was enjoying myself too much to stop."

Glorfindel smiled. "I understand. Now, shall we go?"

"Yep!" Jane replied happily, taking the arm he had offered her.

Glorfindel was enjoying Jane's company more and more. She was very different from the others of her kind he had encountered. Perhaps because in Middle Earth, the rule of so many rulers was failing, that the people were losing hope and becoming bitter because of it. Jane, from her own world, had yet to face the hardships of her race here. She was energetic and cheerful; Glorfindel was drawn to her joyful spirit.

As they walked, he found himself comparing her to the other elleth in Rivendell. The females of his race were tall, lithe, serene, and flawless. While Jane was not short in stature, she was still about a half of a foot smaller than he was. Her figure was different than Elven women; her hips and chest were fuller and in her dress, Glorfindel could see some of the blemishes and scars on her arms and legs, something no elleth he had ever seen had. Some might call these differences imperfections on Jane, but Glorfindel only thought it enhanced her persona. And he wanted to know more of this enchanting young woman.

_She walks as though she is always late, in a hurry,_ Glorfindel noticed to himself as he opened the door for her, going toward a main room in the palace complex. She swayed her round hips almost voluptuously, as though she were luring him in. He had watched her stride many times before when at the archery fields or simply walking around the wood; it was no different then than it was at that moment. But her own attire seemed to accentuate that feature about her. Glorfindel was shaken from his thoughts when Jane turned around to look at him.

"Which way are we going?" she asked lightly, her green eyes captured his pale blue ones.

Glorfindel smiled at her and took her arm gently, leading her left down the hallway after the main corridor, and brought her to a large door. As they walked closer, Jane commented on an entrancing aroma that seemed to be getting stronger. They finally reached a large set of opened the one on the right and the pair entered. Jane's eyes widened in excitement, her nose flared in curiosity, and her stomach growled in anticipation. Before her was a table adorned with an array of food, with many different meats, grains, and produce. At the head of the table sat Elrond and to his left was Erestor. Two seats to the right were left empty, she assumed for herself and Glorfindel. Next to Erestor was Arwen and the twins sat on the end. They eagerly greeted Jane, whisking her away from golden-haired Elf and escorting her to her seat.

"Why the huge feast?" Jane asked, eyeing the pheasant and potatoes next to it hungrily.

Elrohir laughed. "_This_ is hardly a feast."

"We simply asked our father if a meal to suit your tastes would be appropriate," Elladan finished.

Jane smiled widely at the two pairs of identical grey eyes. "Thanks, you guys! This all looks so good." They bowed, looking rather pleased with themselves, and walked back to their chairs.

Elrond smiled warmly. "Lady Jane, it is more than a pleasure to provide a small feast for you. Please, eat."

That was the only encouragement Jane needed. She immediately went for the potatoes and pheasant, followed by the green beans and another meat, which she assumed to be chicken. She was in Heaven. Glorfindel poured her wine as she took her first bite. She sighed in euphoria.

"This is _delicious_," she exhaled happily.

"I am glad you are enjoying it," Elrond replied.

Arwen smiled sweetly at her. Jane was happy to have met her; being surrounded by a group of males was exhausting. The two girls were at similar times in their lives, Arwen aging much more slowly, so they quickly got along. While Arwen was usually silent, the pair found themselves enjoying each other's company.

Jane ate her fill and then some. Light conversation occurred during the meal. At a certain point when Jane was handing her goblet to Glorfindel for another refill, their hands touched. Jane blushed lightly and looked around, but the twins and Arwen were deeply engrossed in their conversation, while Erestor and Elrond were debating over a subject that hardly interested her. Nobody, thankfully, had seen, and Jane pulled her hand away, mumbling a thank you when Glorfindel replaced her goblet onto the table.

_Stop, stop, stop,_ she repeated the mantra in her head as she took a small sip, finally beginning to feel the affects of the strong red wine. _Don't let Blondie get to you, don't be the Mary Sue, don't, don't, do—_

"Lady Jane, how are your lessons progressing?" Elrond asked, giving her something else to think about besides the very attractive lord to her left.

Jane smiled. "Very well, thanks," she said politely. "I'm getting better at sword combat and my archery's really good, too. But I'm having a lot of trouble with my history lessons with Lord Erestor." Elrohir sniggered, receiving a glare from said Elf in response.

"You often lose focus, my lady," Erestor replied gently. "I know it is difficult to retain all this information, but it is important for you to learn."

"All the same," Jane continued, trying to be as bashful and polite as possible, "I think because I have no prior knowledge about Elves, it would be easier for me to learn the language first, before I delve into these documents and texts you give me. I can't speak or understand Elvish, let alone read it. Sometimes the translations into Common Tongue aren't the easiest to grasp."

Erestor nodded in agreement. "I understand your frustration. If you would prefer to terminate your studies and continue later, we shall."

Jane smiled in relief. She thought that conversation would have gone much worse than it did. "Thank you, my lord."

"Well, in that case, who would tutor you in Elvish?" Elrond asked.

Glorfindel interjected before Jane could. "I offered my instruction to Lady Jane, my lord. We would begin before the combative lessons, in the early afternoon."

Elrond nodded. "Very well, that is all settled. Lady Jane, I hope you continue to enjoy your stay here in Imladris," he said, raising his goblet to her.

Jane smiled in reply. "Thanks so much."

"Now, if you will excuse us," said Elrond as he and Erestor stood up, "we have important business to attend to. Lord Glorfindel, will you join us as well?"

Jane almost didn't notice him glance at her, as if he was silently apologizing, as he stood to join the other two. The three bid the rest good night and left through another door, probably headed to Elrond's study.

"Well, Jane," Elrohir practically crooned, standing to approach her chair with the utmost grace, "what shall we do to entertain ourselves tonight?"

Jane yawned, exaggerating her exhaustion. She really had planned on spending the night with Glorfindel, walking, talking, or even just sitting with him—she felt that he had been planning to do so, too, until Elrond called him away. Jane would have liked to spend time with the twins and Arwen, but she was feeling a bit down; she just wanted alone time.

"I'd love to," she said sleepily. "I'm just feeling a little tired. All of that work out with Glorfindel is getting to me," which wasn't a lie. She said she was going to be sore the next day after her lesson and she was more than right; Jane was feeling a very prominent pain in her legs and arms. All she wanted to do was lie down on her bed and sleep away the ache.

"Are you certain?" Elrohir pouted. "We had plans to go riding."

Jane shook her head and looked apologetically at Arwen, feeling bad for leaving her with the Terrible Two. "I'm just really sore and tired. Maybe another time?"

"Very well," Elladan consented. "Another time. But for now, let us escort you to your rooms."

Jane smiled. "Thanks."

The four left the dining hall and spoke of light, conversational things during their walk; Jane asked the twins about their Lórien ladies and they teased her about her secret attraction to the two of them.

"We are irresistible to any female," Elrohir proclaimed proudly. "And you are certainly no exception."

Jane laughed. "I beg to differ. I could tell from the moment I saw you two _saunter_ over to me that you'd be biiig trouble," she explained vivaciously, complete with intricate, drawn-out hand movements. The after-effects of the wine finally getting to her. "Besiiiides," she added, "Glorfindel warned me 'bout you two lady killersss."

Elladan raised an eyebrow as Arwen laughed, glad to see her brothers' plan was backfiring. "And what did our dear Lord Glorfindel divulge to you, Jane?"

"Only that you're lurkers that love to _jump_ on innocent women like, mahself," Jane hiccuped as they passed Glorfindel's study. She squealed lightly and ran to the door. "Maybe he's insiiiide!" she whispered animatedly to the others.

"That is not likely," Elladan said, amused at the girl's antics, "he is surely still occupied with his conference with my father."

Jane sighed unhappily and huffed. "I wanna see hiiiim! He's so nice to me," she breathed euphorically. "And his hair is so shiny and he's so lovely and attractive and—oops." Jane's eyes widened, realizing what she said in her tipsy state. Her eyes quickly darted to the twins, who were grinning widely and Arwen, whose eyes were, Jane assumed, just as wide as hers.

"Why, Jane," Elrohir began in a very patronizing tone, "we had no idea you were harboring such feelings for Lord Glorfindel! How charming."

Jane immediately ran in between the two elves who mirrored the other's smirk. She gave them the most pathetic, pleading look she was capable of. "Ohhhh, please oh please please, don't tell hiiiim! Please promise me! I'll be so embarrassed and I need him to teach me to fight and speak Elf, pleeeease don't tell!"

Elladan widened his eyes, feigning shock. "Jane, what would make you think we would tell such an intimate secret of yours?"

"Just _promise me!_" she whined. "He can't knooow."

The twins nodded in synchronism. "He will never know, as long as _you_ promise not to drink too much around him," Elrohir teased, but Jane was beyond relieved to hear them promise. She kissed them both heartily on the cheek.

"You're all angels, I'm sorry I ever doubted you." Jane went to hug Arwen tightly, who only laughed melodically and returned the embrace, silently promising the girl to hold her tongue on the matter.

Moments later, Jane reached her chambers. She quickly bid the twins and Arwen good night, still feeling woozy for the booze. She took her iPod to her bed and after a quick change into a night gown, she laid down and came down from her tipsy euphoria, thanks to the raspy vocals and scratchy guitar of Ray LaMontagne.

_Can I stay here with you til the morning _

_I am so far from home _

_And I feel a little stoned_

_Can I stay here till the morning _

_There's nothing I want more than to wake up on your floor_

Jane was throughly embarrassed with her actions; she never had any desire for others to know about her attraction to Glorfindel. Even though she knew they wouldn't have spilled the beans, promise or not, but just the vocalization of it made Jane worry. She had no intentions of becoming a Mary Sue in this world, but it looked like there was a force working harder than she was to make it happen. _It's just a tiny crush,_ she tried to reason with herself, but she secretly knew that there was more behind her physical attraction to the golden-haired lord. He had rescued her and was constantly finding ways to protect and rescue her, whether it was providing fighting lessons or getting her out of lessons with Erestor, Glorfindel was always making sure she was comfortable, occupied, and most importantly, happy.

He not only doted upon her so often, but was so intrigued by her. Glorfindel was so full of questions about her old life and herself as a person. She tried not to notice, but there were moments over the past few days she had been there when she would be observing her surroundings, only to land upon Glorfindel's eyes, making her think he had been staring at her before. Jane wasn't certain if it was fascination in her race or her person, but she always found herself blushing when their eyes would meet unexpectedly.

_I've gotta get my shit together before anyone else finds out about this—word of mouth or otherwise,_ she told herself, remembering her constant habit to act like an absolute loon when she was around an object of her affections.

Jane finally felt the events of the day overwhelming her. After promising to keep her often wild emotions in check, she fell into a well-deserved sleep.

**-----------------STOPHERESTOPHERE----------------**

Sooo, any ideas _why_ you're here?

Glorfindel: Nah-uh.

Joker: Nope.

Pippin: (raises hand and jumps up and down wildly) Ooh! Ooh! Missus! Pick me, I know!

Why are you always here, huh?? Okay, Pip. Tell 'em why.

Pippin: Because you're just _borrowing_ them for your story! Besides, it's the_ Author's_ Note! Didn't you tell them that last time?

Well, we all know they're not very good listeners. Except for you! (high fives Pippin) I'm gonna take you out for ice cream, buddy. C'mon, let's go!

Pippin: Hooray! (leaves with author, hand in hand)

Glorfindel: (looks around awkwardly) Ummm... well, what now?

Joker: I dunno, you've done this before, not me.

Glorfindel: Ooh! Okay. I'll tell the readers to review! That sounds about right, huh?

Joker: Can I show you my magic trick, too? I have the pencil ready and everything!

Glorfindel: Maybe later. Look, readers. If you've made it this far, you might as well review. So, go do it!

Joker: Unless you want me to put a smile on that _face!_ (shakes knife angrily)

Glorfindel: No, don't be angry. They don't like that. Just be cool, dude.

Joker: Oops, sorry. But yeah, it'd be kinda boss if you reviewed. Also, go read _Time to Get Serious!_ Cuz it's all about meeeee!

Glorfindel: Okay, bye, guys! (waves)

Joker: Byeeee! (waves)

Glorfindel: Okay, so what's all this about making a pencil disappear?


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note:

Well, here we are again! I had to take a little bittle break from this one; the Joker story I'm writing has me totes occupied. Sorry about that, y'all! And you, too, Glory.

Glorfindel: (huff)

Are you still mad at me?? I apologized like 8 million times. The Joker's just a new fancy, love. You're still my one and only!

Glorfindel: Hmph. (cold shoulder)

Ohhh, dear. Looks like we've got a pouty Elf. No funny send off into the chapter today, guys. Sorry!

---------

Jane hardly had to worry about her crazed feelings the next morning. Glorfindel had been sent away on secret business of Elrond's. It had certainly been a blow to hear that he would be gone for a week at the least. Her lessons had been halted until Glorfindel's return, so now Jane didn't even have the distractions that came with focusing on the wrinkled, aged maps in Erestor's study, or the metallic crashing of her blade as it connected with Glorfindel's during their combat lessons. Jane found herself visiting Roosevelt often in the stables, sometimes even waking up early and riding before sunrise. She was slowly finding her way around Imladris and was becoming briefly acquainted with the other Elves. While they never spoke of her origin, she could tell that after leaving a group of elleth at a small garden, that she was going to have to come up with a quick story to soothe everyone's curiousity.

Arwen had become a close friend in Jane's many hours unoccupied. They had run into each other walking to the stables one afternoon and after taking a ride north, Jane realized that if her older brothers would keep their overactive mouths quiet, Arwen would certainly lose her reputation as the beautiful, silent daughter of Elrond. Jane was beyond relieved to have someone to confide in about many subjects, ranging from the most miniscule of issues with horseback riding, to the very concept of existence. Arwen taught Jane almost everything she could about the Valar and their ancient powers, the Undying Lands in Valinor, and many other Elvin matters that Jane had never even thought of.

"I can't believe you don't have a _period!!!!_" Jane shouted in frustration for the eighth time that hour. It had been almost sixteen days since Glorfindel had left (not that she was counting... okay, she was). She and Arwen had gone to a small tributary near the river Brunien and somehow, the discussion of menstruation happened; such is the way with a conversation with two females, regardless of race, setting, or mood. When Arwen told Jane about their gift of forbearance of "The Gift," Jane hit the proverbial roof. She tried reasoning that it was impossible, unfair, not right, so annoying, unfair, lame, unfair, totally bizarre, so weird, the coolest, and _sooooooo unFAIR_ that Arwen never knew the suffering of period cramps, the terror of hormonal mood swings, or the satisfaction of stuffing your face with the most bizarre food combinations (Jane's personal favorite was fried chicken and Cool Whip with cheap red wine).

Arwen only laughed and shrugged. "I can say that I have not heard any positive knowledge of them, so I do not envy you for that."

"Pfft, you better believe they're awful!" Jane exclaimed. "I'm getting cramps just thinking about it. I mean, they're easier to deal with in my world, we have medication that regulates it for certain times. It helps, but the only way I'll be happy is once I hit menopause and I can't have kids anymore."

"Do you not wish to have children?"

Jane shrugged. "I mean, I'm nineteen. And I guess here, that's marrying age, but where I'm from that's incredibly young. I was studying at a university, getting a degree so I could do something with my life, like find a career and that sort of thing. But I'm like every other girl who dreams about being a mom with a gorgeous husband and adorable kids. I just don't want it know—_especially_ now."

"I understand."

"What about you? Any wee ones on the horizon for you?" Jane asked, knowing very well that Arwen wanted kids and with a certain "ranger from the North."

"I hope to have children some day," she said longingly, not elaborating any further on the subject.

As the pair began their return journey to the stables, Jane launched into an extremely complex explanation on the concepts in Italian Renaissance Art, her area of study in school. Arwen enjoyed to hear about the art of a different world and Jane was more than pleased to tell her about it. The young woman became very engrossed in sharing her knowledge, eager to recall everything she thought she had forgotten over the summer. Even as the companions returned to the stables and returned their horses to their respective stalls, Jane was still explaining the differences in Classical and Romantic, particularly Impressionist, art. She was so focused as she and Arwen walked to Jane's rooms that she had not noticed the golden figure, illuminated in the sun light, riding on his brilliantly white steed towards her.

"And because Impressionists didn't feel the need to—AHH!!" Jane was interrupted in her harangue to see Glorfindel and Asfaloth trotting in their direction.

Glorfindel smiled beautifully in the midday light as Jane rushed to him. He quickly dismounted and laughed as the raven-haired girl cried out in joy and hugged him tightly.

"You're back, you're back, you're baaaack!" Jane chanted rhythmically. "I missed you so much!"

"I am pleased to see you, too," he laughed and placed an arm around her shoulders as she held him tightly. He nodded in greeting to Arwen. "And you, Lady Arwen."

Jane suddenly froze in her celebration, wide eyed. In her jubilation, she had completely forgotten that Arwen was there. She quickly jumped away from Glorfindel, feeling beyond mortified and blushed as Arwen gave her a knowing smile that the golden-haired lord missed, thankfully.

"So you just got back?" Jane asked, following Glorfindel into the stables to ignore the teasing glances from Arwen.

He nodded as he led Asfaloth into his stall. "But now, I must go see Lord Elrond. We have important matters to discuss."

Jane raised her eyebrows in interest. "Ooh top secret, hmm? Well, come and find me whenever you finish. We can go to the archery fields," she suggested, trying to find a way to make up for lost time away from him. She missed him much more than she would let on.

"A very good idea," he agreed. "I had a very strong feeling that you would not be practicing while I was gone," he teased.

"I did!" she defended herself with a smile. "I did archery. But you know I hate the sword and knife business. I'll just stay far away from battles and shoot at the bad ones from there."

"We will see how well your tactic works. But, I must go. It is very good to see you both." He bowed in parting and walked toward the palace complex, undoubtedly to Elrond's study.

Jane sighed happily and fell to the ground in elation as Glorfindel walked far enough away. Arwen only laughed at her friend and joined her on the forest floor. "You love him," she said, causing Jane to shoot up from her spot, red faced and wide eyed.

"I _don't!_" she proclaimed loudly, but feeling her face get even hotter.

"You do," Arwen said all-knowingly. "You spoke of him all the time he was gone and I have never seen you look happier than when you saw him approaching us."

"Yeah, well..." Jane began lamely, "that's because... I, er... he just..._ you_... wait. Oh, sweet baby Jesus." She tried to reason her way out of her friend's declaration, but as she thought about it, she realized that there was reason to think so. She thought about him constantly, got girly and silly whenever he was around, and she _had_ talked endlessly about him when he was gone! But these feelings she felt towards Glorfindel, they weren't so foreign; when she dated her ex-boyfriend, these similar emotions had been there. And Jane knew she hadn't loved him. So maybe with Glorfindel it wasn't love... yet.

"Maybe I do..." she said quietly, feeling a huge smile emerging on her face. "But not the right kind. Oh, fuck. I don't know."

Arwen rested her hand comfortingly on Jane's shoulder. "You will know soon," she said kindly, before adding, "And when you do, I _have_ to be the first to know!"

-------------

Glorfindel had been busy all day with Elrond, so he had no time to see her. But Elladan and Elrohir visited Jane in her chambers to tell her they would be having another small feast to celebrate his return. Jane was more interested, however, in what had sent Glorfindel away in the first place. Her brothers were ignorant to the mission, as well, but quickly dismissed it. They were important parts of the council in Rivendell, but Elrond did have certain affairs that had to be kept secret for a time before others could know. They told Jane they would know soon and it was best to wait until then.

Later that night, Elladan escorted her to dinner, saying Elrohir and Arwen were going on their own. He also complimented her dress, the one she had worn when she was found, and Jane replied by telling him to stop being a pervert. He only laughed as they linked arms.

Upon arriving, there were more members of the council present, making Jane and Arwen the only females present. Jane sat next to Arwen and across from Elladan and Elrohir; Glorfindel sat further towards the head of the table, next to Elrond. But the moment she entered the room, he smiled beautifully and inquired to her about her day. Jane was finding his constant interest in her extremely attractive; it was becoming harder to focus on being a normal human being in the company of other Elves when Glorfindel's presence in her mind was augmenting as she watched him speak to others and occasionally catch her eyes in a warm smile.

Dinner passed with little incident; the twins kept her entertained while she and Arwen whispered about going riding the next day ("Unless I start my lessons with Glorfindel then," Jane teased Arwen. "If he does, you'll have to find a new friend."). Jane had looked hopefully at Glorfindel, that they could spend time with each other that evening, but Elrond had other things in mind. He, Erestor, and Glorfindel, along with other seemingly important Elves left the room, but Glorfindel did not walk away before giving Jane an apologetic look, promising to see her as soon as he could.

She felt slightly downtrodden as everyone else began to trickle out of the hall. She finally understood Glorfindel when he complained about the seemingly endless tasks Elrond had waiting for him. It was more than enough to be teased with the prospect of spending time with him once, but if she had to do it again, she didn't know what she'd do.

The sudden movement of the twins caught Jane's attention. "Jane, let's go riding!" Elladan exclaimed as he and his siblings stood from their chairs with wide smiles.

"To where?" she said, momentarily forgetting her moment with Glorfindel.

"Wherever you desire," Elrohir almost purred, immediately approaching her.

Jane looked at Arwen. "Are they looking to get me into trouble?"

Arwen simply smiled and shrugged. Jane grinned back, always loving the stark contrast between her and her brothers, who never seemed to stop talking. "Fine, let's go."

---------

Elrond's children quickly went to their horses, the twins' steeds as identical as them, while Jane coaxed Roosevelt out of his stall with an apple from dinner. The four rode off, far from the palace and their chambers, into the night.

"Where are we going?" Jane asked Elrohir, riding up next to him.

Elrohir winked. "You'll love it, I promise," he replied vaguely.

Jane rolled her eyes and sped up to ride with Elladan. They talked animatedly, until Elladan looked around, stopping his horse, Eruwestiel. "Here," he proclaimed, quickly dismounting and holding onto the sack he had brought with him from the stables.

The other three followed suit, Jane still worried if they were about to partake in some kind of cult-like animal sacrifice to appease the gods of nature.

Elrohir took a blanket from his horse's back and laid it down, gesturing for her to sit down. Elladan reached into his bag, taking out a bottle and Jane couldn't help but laugh. They stole some bottles of wine. For some reason, it felt like such a human adolescent thing to do, she found herself laughing even more as Elladan uncorked the bottle with a devious grin.

"My lady Jane," Elladan chastised, "you have no right to judge. We all saw you take that fifth refill at dinner."

Jane felt the warm, buzzing feeling from the wine from dinner and sat down on the blanket, still laughing lightly.

"How much does it take to get you drunk? Aren't Elves pretty resistant to alcohol?" she asked, remembering the drinking match between Legolas and Gimli in _Return of the King_.

Elrohir shrugged. "We do not do this for the after-effects. We're—"

"They just want to see what you act like when you have drank too much," Arwen interjected, revealing her brothers' true motive.

Jane scowled at the twins, who were going between smiling innocently at her and glaring darkly at their sister. But Jane simply rolled her eyes, snatched the bottle from Elladan, and took a long swig. She figured it was high time to get shitty; she hadn't been for over a month and in the life of a college student, that was one month too long. So, she figured she could entertain the Elves for her own gain. She didn't mind being their little dancing monkey for the night, doing as they wanted, especially with booze involved.

"I need to get drunk," she justified after she had chugged almost a third of the bottle, noticing the shocked faces of her three companions.

"Jane, you do not drink Elvish wine very often, do you?" Elrohir snickered.

She shook her head. "Not on its own, why?

Elladan grinned. "We do not notice, as alcohol does not affect us like Men. But from what we have seen from our mortal guests, our wine, this kind in particular, is very potent."

As Elladan finished, Jane felt the affects of that half bottle hit her like a freight train.

_Oomph! He was riiiiiight,_ Jane thought as she suddenly had trouble sitting up. She giggled with the twins, who had been stifling their laughter, and Arwen, who only smiled at the results of her brothers' antics.

"No drinks for me, thanks!" Jane said in a very proper British accent, breaking into more laughter.

"For now, anyway," Elrohir laughed.

Jane grinned at her immortal counterparts. "I really like you guys, I hope you know that."

Elladan nodded. "Not as much as you like Glorfindel!"

Jane punched him on his arm much harder than she intended to, but at least she got the message across. "You can shut your dirty mouth, Elly. He _rescued_ me," her voice cracked. "And I missed him soooo muuuuuuuchhhh! So, sshhhhhut up. It's not like you pervies are innocent of fawning after someone. I've seen you two with those elves visiting from Lórien!"

Arwen laughed out loud as her brothers were put in their place. Jane turned at smiled at the giggling elleth and hugged her. "I like you the best, Arwen."

"Don't let Aragorn see you," Elrohir shot back.

Arwen's smiling demeanor was dark and irate in less than a second. She glared at her brothers, who were laughing loudly at their sister's expense.

"Who?" Jane hiccuped, still sober enough to remember that she had never met him.

"Aragon, son of Arathorn," Elrohir explained, winking at his sister, "grew up in Imladris. And Arwen loves him."

"That's so lovely, I love weddings!" Jane said happily. "I've got the wine," she giggled hysterically to herself.

Arwen did not respond, she only stood up quickly and stormed away, much to the protests of her brothers.

"Arwen, we were joking! Come back!"

"Please, don't be upset!"

Jane shakily stood up and scolded the twins. "You big dumbies!" she shouted. With that, she stumbled after Arwen into the forest.

"Arwen, it's only me," Jane yelled. "Don't let your stinky brothers bother you! I bet Aragorn's really great!"

"I'm here, Jane," Arwen called out, only a few yards from where Jane was standing.

The drunk girl staggered over to her upset friend and patted her shoulder. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Aragorn is mortal," Arwen said sadly, her hand resting on the pendant around her neck.

"Well, love is love, right?" Jane tried to reason. "I mean, it'll be hard to watch him get old, but as long as you're together."

Arwen stayed silent, so Jane tried again. "Does he love you?"

Arwen nodded. "He told me before he left. I have not seen him for almost two years."

"That sucks," Jane said drunkly, before pushing inebriation to the side in order to help counsel her new friend. "Lookit, next time you see Aragorn, tell him. Tell him how much you love him and how much he means to you."

"He is so troubled," Arwen replied mournfully. "He has a destiny he does not wish to fulfill and I would help him, I would," her voice began to shake as a few stray tears fell from her brilliant blue eyes. "But he is afraid—afraid of what he must become."

"King of Gondor?" Jane asked skeptically, before adding, "Erestor told me about Isildur and the Dúnedain."

"He must rise to his rightful place," Arwen cried. "The Darkness in the East is growing and my people are leaving; we cannot fight this war for Men. They need a leader."

Jane sighed and placed her arm around Arwen, letting her cry into her shoulder. "Just give him time," Jane assured her distressed friend. "I'm sure he will realize his fate."

Arwen smiled. "Thank you, Jane," she said. "Your wisdom precedes your age."

Jane shrugged. "What can I saaay?" she replied proudly. "I'm good with these kind of things. Boy troubles, not the trials of love and immortality."

Arwen laughed. Without a word, the two walked back to the clearing where the twins still sat, taking swigs from the wine. Jane shouted.

"Oi, don't drink it'aaalll!" she slurred, her drunkenness coming back at full force as she stumbled towards the brothers. She grabbed the bottle from Elrohir as he rose it to his mouth and took a long drink for herself.

Arwen laughed. "I am going back," she said, walking to her horse.

"Meee too!" Jane shouted loudly. "I'm drunk, I don't wanna be out in the middle of the _woods._ Lame idea, twinsies."

"Would you like to return to your chambers?" asked Elladan.

Jane nodded. "Only, don't leave me in there alone and bored and drunk. Hang out with me!! Glory just _drops_ me off there and it makes me so saaad," she whined.

"Glory?" Elrohir stifled a laugh.

Jane grinned. "That's what I call him. Ohh, he's so naaaiice."

"Very well, we will 'hang out' with you," Elrohir promised, helping her to her feet, only to have her stumble and fall into his arms again.

"I can't ride Roosevelt!" she yelled in frustration. "I'll get a DUI! Oops, hehe. I mean an RUI!!!!" She howled with laughter as Elrohir put her on his horse.

"Don't worry. He will follow us," Elladan assured Jane as she stared longingly at her horse.

Jane sighed as she wrapped her arms around Elrohir's waist and rested her head on his back. Roosevelt did gallop off with the four riders, much to Jane's delight. She called out to her steed, telling him how beautiful he was and how much better he was than the horse she was on.

"I'm so drunk I can't even ride you! You're too good to have a drunk master!" Jane told him. "But don't leave me, I won't get this drunk again, I promise! Love you, Rosieee!"

Jane continued confessing her adoration for her horse until they brought him back to the stable. She held onto Elladan for support as he, Elrohir, and Arwen walked her back to her chambers. As they walked, the four saw Glorfindel and the twins froze in terror. Jane, however, was more than ecstatic to see him.

"Gloorryyyy!" she shouted, running to him and embracing him tightly. "Tonight was sooo lovely, eating all that food was great and then we went ridiiiing! I _missed_ you, though! You can't go leave like that all the time, I get tooooo saaaaaadddddd," she slurred, elongating her words.

The golden-haired lord could tell Jane had been subject to much more drink. If her actions were not enough, the smell of Miruvor poured out of her mouth as she spoke. He held her up as she began to sway from inebriation. She grinned up at him sleepily, the alcohol finally slowing down her body.

"Ima be so good at Elf-lish," she slurred more slowly as she leaned against Glorfindel. "Jus'... wait." Jane felt her eyes begin to close and quickly succumbed to a very drunken sleep.

Glorfindel did not say anything, he only glared darkly at the twins, promising to deal with them later. In the meantime, there was a sleeping woman in his arms he had to attend to. He picked her up and walked her to her room, leaving Elrond's children feeling slightly guilty.

Jane mumbled as Glorfindel held her and moved her head into the nook of his shoulder and neck. She breathed deeply, each exhale lightly caressing Glorfindel's neck. The Elf lord had trouble focusing on walking. With Jane wearing a dress that exposed her legs, he could feel the softness of her thighs as he held her. Glorfindel looked down, only to see her ample cleavage from the dress. Thoughts clouded his mind as he tore his eyes from her body. He sighed in relief as they reached her chambers, his mind suddenly running wild with images of her he wished he could quell. He brought her to her bedroom, took off her shoes, and placed her in her bed under her warm blankets. She snuggled into her soft pillows happily and yawned, suddenly waking up. She regarded Glorfindel as he made sure she was comfortable.

"Can I have a glass of water?" she murmured quietly, feeling her eyes closing for good but wanting to prevent a hangover the next morning.

The Elf lord smiled and brought her the goblet in her room with water from her pitcher. She sat up in bed and drank it slowly. "Thanks," she said as she finished and placed it on her bedside table.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to get this drunk," she apologized sheepishly. "Elvin wine is reeeeally strong."

Glorfindel laughed and nodded. "Men are very prone to the effects of Miruvor. Do not apologize."

Jane smiled and looked out her window. "The stars look so beautiful tonight," she said serenely before turning to Glorfindel. "Will you stay with me until I fall asleep?"

"Of course, Jane," he consented, bringing a chair next to her bed. "I will stay."

The young woman couldn't help but smile at the Elf lord as the moonlight illuminated off of his golden hair. His eyes did not leave hers, making her feel all the more safe and comforted as she felt sleep overcome her again.

**---------STOPHERESTOPHERE--------**

Well, did that help at all, little buddy?

Glorfindel: Hmph, welll... maybe a little. I mean, I got a peak at Jane's goods.

Glad I could help.

Haldir: Ew, pervert.

Glorfindel: You're one to talk!

Yeah, seriously. Don't think I didn't see you trying to watch me shower this morning!

Haldir: I have no idea what you're talking—

(shows pictures of Haldir trying to look over the shower curtain, dated today)

Haldir: Well, okay. But it was just one time!

Glorfindel: (shows _more_ pictures of Haldir doing the same thing, with different dates)

Haldir: (shrugs) I've got needs, too!

(eye roll) Whatever. We'll find you a woman or something later. Just... stay out of my bathroom.

Haldir: By the way, I like that little beauty spot on your—

OKAYYY, moving on! So, little readers, be a reviewer! Pretty please? It'd make me really happy!

Glorfindel: And I'm still oh-so-upset! Reviews would do wonders for me.

Haldir: Maybe let me know if I can watch _you_ shower!

Ew, stop being a creep. Nobody'll read this anymore.

Haldir: Oops, sorry. Umm, well I'll... shower _with_ them if they review?

(sigh) You're gonna need some work, buddy.


End file.
